Excerpts

You don’t want me, but no one else can have me
Possessive…
Selfish…
Greedy…
Holding onto half of me so no one will have me whole-heartedly
But you want me to be happy…
I’d forgotten the meaning of the word when your presence meets mine
I couldn’t be around you without feeling as if my world was crashing down
I didn’t remember what smiles look or felt like
I hadn’t heard my own laugh in what seems to be an eternity
Self-respect had flown away, integrity fallen by the wayside
I didn’t know who I was when I was with you
I didn’t like who I was when I was with you
Yet, I couldn’t leave…
I wouldn’t leave, my heart wouldn’t let me
But I loved you…
And I stayed…


-excerpt from the poem, "Be Alone", from the book, "Pure Confessions Volume 1".






I’ve had it up to heaven with frustration
Wondering what I’m doing wrong, how to go about
Doing things to please, people, yet I’m living


Unhappily


Never knowing which way to turn, can’t figure out
Why people think what they do about me
They keep on saying, “she’s so…


Sensitive”


Taking everything too seriously, learn to let my
Hair down, free of inhibitions, boundaries
Let go and let God, flow with it, let it all


Ride, don’t know how


Instead of coming down on me, how about opting
To try and understand my heart and my mind
Before you judge, don’t look at me funny
When you see my SOS, you say nothing
And then I shut down and the questions come
Never in a million years could I have thought
I could feel like the world is against me


Time out


-excerpt from the poem, "Flow", from the book, "Pure Confessions Volume 1".

This fire in my soul ignites and replaces

Flames extinguished by tears in my eyes

Forever wondering if I’ll ever be good enough

I already am, to me, that is what counts

Don’t need you to tell me how to live, act

Write

I express myself how I please

Being me is read in no book written

Can’t be taught, no class to take

It’s time out for sarcasm, blistering hatred

I don’t need it, dealing with enough already

Nothing of making me better comes from you

-excerpt from the poem, "Judge and Jury", from the book, "Pure Confessions Volume 1".

Elisha was disappointed that she hadn’t run into the man she’d been crushing on for quite some time now. She’d seen and danced with the other guys she’d ever had any kind of ‘thing’ for in the past. But she wanted Dante to show up to make her night complete.

Dante was another chocolate brother.  But he was different. He was dark chocolate. His eyes were such that if he looked at someone, it was almost as if he was piercing into his or her soul, reading their minds, digging into their inner most feelings and thoughts. He had dreads past his shoulders, kept neatly, not too thick. He was perfection’s prototype, if there was such a thing.

He was a very distinguished man, as he worked an attorney for a law firm in Atlanta. He wore suits everyday, and Elisha was turned on by the way he looked in them. That was part of his appeal. He looked even better in street clothes, off the clock.

Being that the love of her life, in her own mind, was nowhere to be found, she continued to have an awesome time at her birthday party. She danced with Michael, then with Terrance, and with her girl. Suddenly, the DJ’s voice permeated the atmosphere.

“Aight, ‘chall. Time to slow it down for a lil’ while. Guys, grab a girl, and let’s get to slow dancin’. The next thing Elisha knew, much like the Red Sea, the crowd separated, and there he stood in the distance. In shock, Elisha stood there, staring and smiling. Her heart was pounding. The most beautiful man she’d ever known was finally there. It was almost like he had been sent from heaven. There was a glow around him, some sort of light seemingly shining from above. He walked towards her, wrapped his gigantic, muscle-bound arms around her waist, and held her close…sheer ecstasy.

-excerpt from Chapter 3 of the novella, "Birthday Girl". 

“Is everything okay, Darian?” Elisha asked with an apprehensive look on her face. “You said you wanted to talk, and you look like somethin’ is botherin’ you. What’s up? Talk to me.”

“Nah, ma. Everything ain’t okay,” Darian said as if he were holding back tears. He was never the type to allow people to see him upset. If he did show it, it was serious. He reached in his back pocket and pulled out a ring box. He opened the box, and inside was a beautiful, 24-karat white gold engagement ring, His eyes began to well up as he started to speak again.

“I was gonna give her this junk, man.” Darian began to yell. “You know how much this ring cost me? Huh? She ain’t gettin’ it now, that’s for damn sure. I can’t believe this!”

“What the hell is goin’ on, Darian? Am I missin’ somethin’?” Elisha was totally confused at this point. All she knew was bad news was about to come out. “Come sit on the couch and let’s discuss this.” Elisha wrapped one arm around Darian’s shoulders while he began to weep as they walked over to the couch. Before sitting down, Darian reached back into his back pocket and pulled out a folded manila folder. He slammed the folder on the couch and sat down, his face filled with a mixture of rage, sadness, and perplexity.

Elisha opened the folder and pulled out his credit card bill and five pages worth of emails and instant messages that Mika had been sending over the Internet. They were conversations she’d been having with some other man who lived close to her. The conversations stemmed from July of the previous year to two days before Elisha’s birthday. The two had been carrying on a secret relationship, spending time together in hotels, even in each other’s homes. In one of the earlier emails, he described himself as “a Chocolate brotha with dreads.” Darian was heartbroken. Elisha sat there reading the emails, in total shock.

-excerpt from Chapter 12 of the novella, "Birthday Girl".

My ReverbNation Page

Like an addict in need of another hit, you were my drug of choice

Now I find myself craving, I’m a fiend, I want more

Once I get it I’m good, for the moment, but then I’m stuck in that moment

Can’t move, and no desire to, almost like a state of depression, I’m suppressed

Compelled to digress from all future progression, stagnant

I need to shake you off, this bad habit you brought upon me, I have break free, but don’t want to

I let you corrupt me, you’re tainted and I knew it, but it felt so good, you tasted so good

Your juice, my nectar, they make for a sexy combination, you gave me lethal injections

Of lust and sex, constantly high, sloppy and slurred, uninhibited and incoherent,

Had me to stupid in sin, crazy for craved chaos, and though I know I don’t need it, I like it

It’s on my mind day and night, I eat, breathe, bathe, and bask in it, in you

Got me cursing Satan for his spawn and thanking God for His blessing, you’re the best of both worlds

This type of love can’t be good for me, it’s doing bad things for me

Yet it feels so good to me, feels good inside me, but this type of love isn’t suppose to happen to me.

-excerpt from the poem "Illicit Permissible Solicitation" from the book "Pure Confessions Volume II".

His smile is doing things to me

Lookin’ at me like he wants me

That look like ‘come holla at me’

And I might, I just might reply.

I’m fightin’ walkin’ over to him

To tell him I’m diggin’ him

Sayin’ I might wanna chill with him

But I don’t wanna hurt you.

You do mean the world to me, baby

And I’d do anything for you, baby

Love you with all my heart and soul, baby

But I feel a change comin’ on.

-excerpt from the poem, "I Love You, but I Want Him", from the book, "Pure Confessions Volume II".

Take my hand and lead me,

Teach me what you want me to learn.

Use me, amuse me, and make me your muse.

Make poetry of me, create a symphony.

Bring forth the tools to mold me,

Sculpt me, mind, body, and soul.

Make me your whistle

And blow life into me.

Your jazz and your funk

Your rock and your roll.

Make me a song, your song.

Give me lyrics to last

Throughout eternity and a day.

-excerpt from the poem, "Muse" from the book, "Pure Confessions Volume II".

“What the hell is going on here?” Yvonnia asked. “You two know each other?”

“Mommy, this is my man. Or at least I thought he was my man.”

“Sheree . . . Yvonnia . . . I can explain.” Kane said, his voice trembling and his hands shaking. He could barely stand still.

“Let’s hear it,” Sheree said.

“Yeah. Kane, is it? Do tell,” Yvonnia snarled, backing Kane into a corner.

“Okay. Maybe I can’t,” he responded.

“You better tell me somethin’, Kane. Or is it Tony?” Sheree argued.

“My name is Tony. Kane is just a nickname,” he began.

“What else have you not told us, TONY?” Sheree interrogated.

“I met your mother, whom I had no idea was your mother, the day after you and I had our first dinner. I delivered the jewelry you gave her. I was so taken by her beauty that I went back a few moments after I left and asked her out. She said ‘yes’, and that was the beginning of it.”

“So that’s why you canceled on me that night? Because you had a date with my MOTHER?” Sheree shouted.

“Ree Ree, I didn’t KNOW she was your mother. And at the time, I was still single. So, technically, I could see anyone I wanted whenever I chose to. And I did.”

“So all this time, my man has been sleeping with my mother . . . WHILE he’s sleeping with me. Unbelievable,” Sheree said, shaking her head and walking towards the couch. “So, are we both your girlfriends, then?”

“Great question,” Yvonnia interrupted. “Are we both your girlfriends, Tony?”

Sighing and holding his head down in shame, Kane got quiet.

“ANSWER ME, DAMN IT!” Sheree shouted, not realizing the lovely dinner she cooked was getting cold.

“Well, technically . . .”

“Oh, technically my ass. Are we or are we not?” Yvonnia asked.

“Technically, yes,” Kane answered.

Both throwing their hands up in the air and walking away from Kane, all the mother and daughter could do was stand on opposite sides of the living room and stare at each other and back at Kane. He could say nothing at this point, but attempted to anyway.

“Look, mamis. I know I messed up. However, I fell for both of you at the same time. I just didn’t know what to do or who to choose. I’m very sorry that I’ve come between you.”

“And mommy!” Sheree shouted. “I’m not sure if I can live this one down. And you two been sleepin’ together? I mean, the thought just . . . ugh! Now I need to soak in bleach. I mean, Kane, or Tony – whatever the fuck your name is – we JUST had a quickie before my mother knocked on the door. You couldn’t tell me three months ago you were fuckin’ someone else?”

“At the beginning, I didn’t think I needed to tell you anything. As time grew, I was so immersed in the both of you, falling in love with the both of you, I just didn’t know what to do,” Kane explained.

“Well, now the food is cold, and I’m pissed. This was supposed to be a special dinner, but it went to shit before it even started. Thanks a lot, Mom and Kane. Hope you both are happy.”

“Ree Ree, I’m just as shocked as you are,” Yvonnia said. “Don’t be mad at me.”

“Whatever!” Sheree exclaimed.

Just then, something jumped in Sheree’s mind as she walked over to the desk in the living room and opened up the top drawer. She pulled out a sealed envelope, walked back to the kitchen table, and slammed it down on the table in front of Kane, startling him.

“I guess this would be a good time to show you this,” she said.

“What is it?” Yvonnia asked. Sheree did not answer her mother. “Sheree, what’s going on?”

“Sheree, what’s going on?” Kane inquired.”

“I haven’t been feeling very well lately. So I went to the doctor and had some tests run,” Sheree disclosed to the two of them.

“And?” Kane said, waiting for her to finish her statement.

“Just open it!” Sheree screamed.

Looking puzzled, Kane snatched the envelope off the table and opened it. As if he’d seen a ghost, his jaw hit the floor. He stares at the mother and daughter and then back down at the paper.

“It’s positive.”

-excerpt from the short story, "My Sheree Amore".